a very very significant day yesterday. (: never thought that I could be doing what I am doing, but yet the milestones and breakthroughs are happening during my entire A-level season. God is so good.
after CG yesterday, got home and into my room to just thank God. just felt a surge of gratitude in my heart because I know so clearly that I could never be where I am today without Him. without the Pastors and the leaders that He has placed in my life. on my knees telling God how thankful I am, God told me He is proud of me. and I think at the end of the day that’s what really matters the most to me. preaching and leading, ministering, doing everything else that I do is never about meeting the requirements of a title, never about gaining recognition and admiration, never about trying to impress anybody. but it’s about loving God back, about honouring God with my life and bringing others to their destinies in God. it’s about making my Dad up there proud, to be able to be called a good and faithful servant, a daughter that glorifies her Father in every area of her life..
as I looked at the people in LR50 yesterday, felt so much in my heart…for them as a group, and each of them as individuals. see not just a pool of potential, but I genuinely felt a power that is going to be released over the entire CG. will never take them for granted. to be able to lead them to walk, run into their destinies in God, in heart of God church, i count it one of my greatest privileges. they’re gonna rise up to build and do amazing things that are of an eternal purpose. so excited.
I also remember that I first learnt how to do so because of the people who did the same for me.
Zhilin, she was always speaking to me like I was already a leader even when I wasn’t one yet. i remember how she will say things like, “next time when you preach in CG”, “next time when you minister to someone”, “next time when you disciple a person”… all these phrases she may not have thought much about it, but I caught these phrases and I ran with them, because it cast me a vision for myself, it made me realise that my leader believed that I will be doing these things one day.
Jieru, she saw the potential in me when I was 13. but she didn’t stop there. she sowed into my life, discipled me, loved me, trained me, taught me so that I could move from potential to power, so that I could break out of whatever limitations and insecurities/fears that I had to be walking into my destiny in God. she has always been there to celebrate with me on the mountains, and to comfort me and assure me in the valleys. whenever I go for outings with people, I always tell myself I’m gonna be like Jieru – to see the good and bring out the best in people. and I realised I often end up sharing with people about what Jieru herself has taught me, what Jieru herself has done for me. without Jieru, I can never be where I am today.
All the other leaders…some of my biggest inspirations… Dom, whom I wanted to model after since I was still very new in church because I was so captivated by his love for God and the next generation. Lynette, who gave me so many opportunities and spoke into my life at the times I needed them the most. Sharyl, who believed in me and taught me so much in this past year.
Pastors… pastors who don’t see me where I am right now but see me in my future. Pastors who have thousands of people to think about, but they think about me and know my place in heart of God church. From SP How’s comment on my instagram to call me a leader, to the encounter at the office where he said I could be a ZM, to the day he said I can lead 500, I knew my Pastor saw me and believed in me as an individual and not just another person in the church. From SP Lia’s first tweet to me, to the first time she hugged me, to the first time she prayed for me, I knew that my Pastor loves me for who I am. Words cannot adequately describe the respect and love i have for the both of them.
Jesus. who was, who is, who will be. at the end of the day, everything is because of You here in my life. I am grateful. and I will always be grateful, always gonna be loving and giving to You to build Your kingdom. never taking who You are in my life for granted. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me and will forever be.